Lessons · Parenting

Making Homemade Baby Food (What You SHOULDN’T Do)

Mistake Number One: I decided one day to be healthy.

Here I am, a new mom, my baby is 5 months and I think to myself…

I’m going to be really healthy and give her the absolute best stuff. None of those preservatives or extra additives, I’m going to make all my baby food at home.

Me now:

But we were all young and naive once. (Well… kind of.. I’m giving baby number two homemade baby food, but that’s because of food allergies. ANYWHO!)

Right. So… Healthy. Homemade. Baby food.

Mistake Number Two: I decided to start with carrots.

Why is this a mistake? Carrots are a high-fiber food with a LOT (Read: A LOT) of texture. For a baby who’s never had ANY texture before, this might be a big deal.

Yeah, I don’t really know either. I just remember I read the baby food container from the store and thought…

“Pshhh. Carrots and water? How hard can this be?”

So you know what I did next?

I cut up the carrots into a relative small size, added enough water to make a paste, and blended it.

Mistake Number Three: They were raw.

Yes. I am brilliant I tell you! You see… I didn’t think to cook the carrots before blending them. Why is this a problem? I know you’re pretty smart, so I’ll ask a simple question. What’s the difference between raw carrots and cooked carrots? Did you say that one was squishy? That’s exactly the difference. And would you believe that it makes a big difference to how it blends? (See “texture”)

Yes. This was shaping up to be quite the adventure! Then… The Big Test.

Mistake Number Four: I decided to feed it to my baby. (My poor.. poor.. baby…)

I’m so glad I went through all of this with number one so that baby number two can actually eat the food I make.

Yes. I tried to feed it to my child. Would you like to know the face she made?

At the time of writing this, I had to take a five minute break due to laughing SO HARD at the remembrance that that gif is truly the face she made.

Well.. First there was coughing. Then gagging. Then outright horror. And a look that said,

“My GOD woman! Are you trying to KILL me?”

Yes, child. That’s exactly what I’m trying to do. Death by healthy, raw, blended food.

Luckily, she somehow survived this episode and turned into the sassy, sweetheart we all know and love now.

Got a baby story that cracks you up? Similar ridiculousness? Comment and lemme know. 🙂

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